It’s widely accepted that the key to a successful relationship is aligned values. For most people, when searching for a partner – romantic or otherwise – they look for someone that not only thinks like they do, but also has a similar outlook on what’s important in life.

Business owners have to ensure there is value alignment across a whole host of different relationships in their company – but often overlook one of their most important relationships: the work-family relationship.

The two are closely connected, especially for business owners, yet they spend little or no time thinking about how well they are aligned, in terms of values, aspirations and culture.

As a result, owners find themselves stuck between a rock and a hard place. They want to be one thing to their family, but another to their business, and quickly find out that it’s impossible to cultivate a successful relationship between the two. They end up compensating on both sides and a feeling of failure consumes them because, as they see it, they are neither the family person nor business figure they want to be.

Family-first approach

We all know the right thing to do is to put our families first, but how many of us can actually say we take this approach in business?

As Patrick Lencioni put it: “If my clients ran their companies the way we run this family, they’d be out of business.” In other words, by business owners putting work first all the time, their family life starts to suffer.

However, for most of the leaders we talk to, it is their perception of how successful they are at home which truly defines how happy they are. So, instead of making decisions through the lens of the business, it makes more sense to adopt a family-first approach and take alignment from a personal perspective.

How is this achieved?

Bringing your business back into alignment with you and your family’s personal values, aspirations and culture is not something that can be achieved overnight. It starts with asking yourself some pertinent personal questions, including:

· What is the ‘why’ of my family?
· What is unique about my family?
· What does my family aspire to achieve?
· What does ‘good’ look like to my family?
· What is my role within the family?

Then it’s a case of asking the same sort of questions about your business:

· Why did I start the business in the first place?
· Why is my vision for the business?
· What is my role within the business?
· Is the business heading in the right direction?
· Does the business still reflect my personality?

It’s then a matter of bringing the two sets of answers together to see how in sync they are with each other.

If you answered those questions and tallied your answers together when you first started the business, the likelihood is that they will have aligned pretty well. However, as time goes on and the business evolves, the two can grow apart unless you’re making decisions with a family-first mindset and constantly ensuring alignment of values, aspirations and culture.

While it’s easy to think, “What will this mean to my family?” when making larger business decisions, you’re less inclined to consider every decision through this personal prism. But, it only takes a number of small decisions for a business to evolve away from what you intended it to be. Therefore, it’s crucial that you are continually cultivating alignment.

At Agnentis Partners, we see businesses through the eyes of the owner. Taking a whole person perspective, we get to know you and your business, helping you to make decisions that align with your personal vision for both your family and your company.